Humor articles

Humor Department to be Renamed Alternative News

The Humor Department will be renamed Alternative News following an executive order by the Alternative News (formerly Humor) editors sophomore Kerwin Chen and juniors Shaina Peters and Michael Xu. The executive order is to take place immediately, without further consultation with other departments of The Spectator. The executive order follows several muted years of the

Take a Tour of Stuyvesant

Hello, and welcome to Stuyvesant High School! My name is Michael, but you can call me Charon because we’re about to take a journey through hell. For the parents, try not to be overly intimidated by Stuyvesant, but just in case, I brought a stretcher and a defibrillator.   If you have any questions, please

Spotlight On: Valentines of Stuy

As February approaches, many single Stuyvesant students become acutely aware of their crippling loneliness, and attempt to fill the void with scrumptious gastronomic delights. Oh, perhaps a valentine as well. In this month’s edition, Humor will be putting the spotlight on some of the valentines in Stuyvesant.   Winnie Li: Winning Her Boyfriend’s Heart We

A Letter to a Special Someone

Dear Mr. Perfect, We first met in the cafeteria, where I caught you lunging desperately for my French fries and stuffing biscuits into your mouth. I was enthralled by your ravenous appetite, the velocity at which you shoveled the food into your gaping maw, awestruck by the amount of spittle that flew forth, and delighted

Trump’s Brain Analysis

Many are baffled in light of the Trump administration’s actions over the last month. Not even the most skilled psychologists can truly identify Trump’s characteristics. Is he chaotic good? Chaotic evil? Or maybe just chaotic? People are still concerned that Trump is simply not fit to be a politician, let alone the president. In response

Putin and Trump on a horse
Art by Christine Jegarl

Trump and Putin Plan their First Date

The following is a series of e-mail interactions between U.S. President Donald Trump and Russian President Vladimir Putin taken from Trump’s private e-mail server:   To: Vladimir Putin <[email protected]> From: Donald Trump <[email protected]> Subject: Talk Russian to Me   Vlady, My e-mail address may not seem familiar to you, but it is me: The Donald.

Heartfelt Letters Between Putin and Trump

Dear Vladimir, As we expected, the election would go just the way we wanted. The masses were angry at the electoral college, and they’re still unsure of what will happen after my inauguration. But, to be fair, so am I. Because of the challenges our countries may have to face in the coming years, we

A Guide to Final Exams

Finals week might be over, but we all have some takeaways. Here’s our fantastic and simple guide to study for next term’s finals, whether you have 10 or 11 finals:   Week before finals week: Open your 27 textbooks, lay out your 92 study guides, and hope that you have every possible resource available. Make