Author Archives: Michael Xu

What You Missed At Spectator Recruitments

           For everyone who missed the Spectator Recruitments, shame on you. Allow me to just gloat about it and make y’all feel terrible.         First off, let’s take a look at me—yes, me, not-funny Humor editor! If you write for the Spectator, you can be 98.7491 percent as awesome as me! (You’ll never be just as

The More-Practical AP

Stuyvesant is constantly adding new APs, and this year is no exception. The Programming Office has finally added the coveted AP Lunch (available period nine—it’s for hardcore eaters). In light of recent events, the Programming Office is adding AP Alternative Government and Politics (AGAP). AGAP is being offered to any student who meets the GPA

Lost and Found Box Over-Flowing

Stuyvesant’s Lost and Found box has overfilled to the point where the abandoned Hudson staircase has been reopened in order to accommodate the items. School officials are seeking recognition of the issue and have signed up for the next season of “Hoarders.” One entire set of stairs was a meticulously arranged collection of phones, confiscated

Trump Resigns: Supporters Claim “Election Rigged”

In a stunning course of events, president-elect Donald Trump has formally renounced his victory on Election Day, as he calls for the Electoral College to be disbanded. Trump made his announcement from Trump Tower, with tickets sold at a starting price of $25,000. “I like to keep my options open,” Trump declared. “Being president for

Photo by Victoria Huang

A Reflective Revision of the New York City Social Studies Curriculum

Six large, textbook-like guidebooks sit on the coffee table of Interim Acting Principal Eric Contreras’s office. They represent remnants from Contreras’s time as the Executive Director of Social Studies with the New York City Department of Education (DOE) and detail the entirely new social studies curriculum he worked to create. The new curriculum, which caters


The Spectator correctly predicted that the president would be either Donald Trump or Hillary Clinton. Trump declares his presidency to be for everyone, from working class whites to more working class whites, to potentially-wealthy whites. Trump’s comprehensive “Hundred Days” plan includes: Banning congressmen from serving any terms at all Creating a requirement such that for

Dear Alec

Go Ask Alec!

Two letters? Wow! Life is good Dearest Alec, How old is too old to go trick-or-treating? My son is turning four in December and I want to know if I’m allowed to trick-or-treat with him. Yours, Laszlo Sandler   Dearest Laszlo, One simple answer: If you have to ask that question, you’re probably too old.

Stuy’s Strangest Mysteries Uncovered

The Forgotten Dwarves of the Escalators Once upon a time, there were 14 jolly freshmen. They were understandably elated to have been invited to learn here at Stuyvesant, the grandest and most exclusive of antiquity’s schools. They came prepared with all they would ever need—wide-ruled three-subject notebooks, swimming suits, and index cards—but nary in sight